Long Stories - By Title

I was absolutely swept away by both chapters. It's been a long time since I've read a piece that gave me such a strong sense of character from the get-go - I love how real Cassandra is and how well you write her - it's like she's leapt out of the story in the flesh, along with Imoen. I also love how you took the dream sequence and changed it to reflect an immersive world where the PC doesn't get a box jumping up and showing her the sacrifices she can pick - that was very nicely done.

Basically, Baldur's Gate sagas have been committed to fanfic before, but I can honestly say that yours has an impressive and unique flavour that I'm very happy to read more of. So basically, I can't wait until your next update. ^_^ Thanks for sharing this with us. :D

I'm just playing through the Imoen romance and its so much fun! Too bad you didnt finish this story.

Hey TC Dale!

This was a very touching chapter, and I think your pacing worked well given the tension and thriller-ish nature of the last few! I must admit, I was very surprised that Elhan gave in to Imoen like that, and then just up and left them. My impression of him in the game was that he was quite arrogant and suspicious, but perhaps that was just me.

That said, the reconnection with nature, not to mention the development between the siblings themselves, was done very touchingly. I really, really liked Imoen's real expression of concern over who exactly Cassandra was and how far she'd fallen to the Taint, and what followed was beautifully and tenderly done.

In short, I'm looking forwards to your next chapter. :)

I surely didn't expect this, you surprised me but in a good way.

I loved how you described all the sex scene, it was intimate and sexy. I'm sure Imoen made Cass very, very happy...

Now, why do I feel like this is the calm before the storm?

Hi TC Dale! Great to see you back, and great to know that the family visit went so well. :D

This chapter was interesting. Aside from the fact that you captured the grandeur of the Keep wonderfully, Imoen's antics and reactions to it throughout the chapter were very interesting. The part with the wagoneers seemed a little jarring given Cassandra's position, but with Imoen as the instigator it worked. I'll admit I was surprised as well by the revelations of what happened to Nalia and Aerie. You've painted the Majordomo here as a consummate professional, and I think that that played well too.

And with the promise of more development to come, I look forwards to seeing what you have for us next. :)

Thankees! The typo at the end is corrected (and a grammatical mistake I found on re-reading it). We're entering the final stretches of the story, now that Cassie and Imoen are back on the surface (I'm guessing, very roughly, maybe 17 chapters total). I hope things stay exciting for you!

This is a wonderful fic I luv it ^.^ keep going!

*Whistles*. All right, I thought I'd go the other side of constructive criticism this time and point out the things that really worked well for you. First of all, Alan. Brilliant description; only a few lines of depiction and action, and he was there as a pretty firmly sketched character. Secondly, the get-together at Aran's; it made a lot of sense tactically and politically, and it was both interesting and in character to see Keldorn and Cassandra clashing like that. Thirdly, your portrayal of the Shadow Thieves in all of its breadth was awesome.

A few tiny nitpicks, but mainly to do with spelling again. I think you spelt 'garish' as 'garnish' and Keldorn as 'Keldor' once, but those are pretty inconsequential. Can't wait to see the showdown that will eventuate.

Wow, you've completely redone the atmosphere of Bodhi's lair. From creepy to downright disturbing and frightening. The memories of Nalia definitely helped with that, as well as the damn cliffhanger at the end. I'm itching to see how you work it out!

Glad you’re enjoying it! And thanks for letting me *know* that you’re enjoying it ;) Feel free to check out my other stories as well — none of them are this god-awful long, but you might find something you like.

Thank you for another chapter and have a good year 2010.

I'm really captivated by this story. These are great characters and you've done a really good job of painting their inner thoughts and you have an excellent ear for dialogue.

Thanks for sharing.

Still good.. I really resent Elhans attitude. Funny that you always run into these people in Baldur's Gate.. although it is even more apparent in KOTOR2. Anyway, looking forward to more.

Hi Shadowhawke! Thanks for pointing out the typos -- they're fixed now, so it should flow a little better.

The Prismatic Wall wasn't the original plan, actually. I was going to go with the Rhynn Lanthorn, but then I to the point where I was describing the prismatic wall (originally just a big, jeweled door) and felt that the prismatic wall explanation fit the flow better at the moment. And, I'd neglected to mention the Rynn Lanthorn in earlier chapters (oops). I think it works okay, either way. We'll find out here pretty soon.

You'll get more elven goodness on Monday when the second half of Chapter 16 posts. And we're only 1 or 2 chapters away from the end, so keep reading!

Very nice.

The grim focus on the need for Elhan’s suicidal rush, the physical climb into the tree instead of going through the palace, all really built up the tension to confronting Irenicus. I only really had two picks with this chapter; firstly, although I smiled at seeing Irenicus’ original lines, they seemed to lose a little of their emotional intensity directed at Cassandra as opposed to Ellesime; this is just my own opinion, but a lot of the impact I felt at that scene was the direct confrontation between the two. I felt that if you wanted same level of emotional intensity at Cassandra and Irenicus’ confrontation, it might have been better to focus more on Cassandra and Irenicus’ relationship rather than Irenicus and Ellesime. Just my own personal opinion, of course.

There seemed to be a few more grammatical/spelling mistakes than normal (I’ve PMed you on Spellhold with the ones I saw), but I salute your much darker take on the Tree battle with Irenicus. Getting rid of the sapping parasites and replacing them with tendrils of magic was very interesting. As I’ve said before, your tweaking of the Bhaal powers and your much more in-depth look into magic works amazingly. I can’t wait to see what the effects of the magic on Imoen was, and what happens next.

Sorry for being so late in replying. Just wanted to say I like how you have Cassandra and Jaheira so obviously grating against each other - it makes for some fascinating party dynamics. And I loved the realism with which you approached the Circus Tent - for those of us who've played through it so many times, it's hard to roleplay it every time, but you invested the scenes with real freshness and vigour, and that was a joy to read.

Just a little note this time, though - I noticed that your grammar sometimes tripped over a little in this chapter. The main example I can think of is when Cassandra asked "What matter?". Just little things that are easily fixed. :)

But aside from that nitpicking, overall I did enjoy the fresh take on BGII very much, and I can't wait to see more!

Just want to say that I'm really enjoying 'Crumbling Down'. I've always thought that the relationship between the PC & Imoen was one of the most intriguing parts of the BG Series & this story takes that to a whole new level. I especially enjoyed this week's excerpt. Great Stuff !! Anxiously awaiting next week's update. I now actually have a reason to look forward to Mondays. :) Thanks !

Hey again TC Dale. :D

Just wanted to say that I enjoyed the realism in your new chapter - I can definitely see Bodhi doing something like that, and it's an intriguing idea I hadn't thought of before, dealing both with the physical necessity of them having to rest after going through so much and also the fact that they're on a time limit. I also loved the fascinating explanation of traps that you had and the interesting character interaction that that discussion provided.

I have to say, I think the only nitpick I have with the chapter was that it was too short. :) In comparison with your other posts, it felt a little abrupt, and so the pacing necessarily suffered. But other than that, I'm definitely looking forwards to the next chapter. :D

You definitely have a knack for inducing anxiety! Or maybe that's just me. Although I can't say I really like your PC's personality--I mean I wouldn't like her as a person if I met her--I still like how she's written. I always appreciate realistic personalities (after all, it'd be nigh on impossible to remain passive and unemotional as a Bhaalspawn), and you've fleshed out Imoen a great deal too. I especially liked her explanation of the trap, and Cass's reaction, and Cass actually enjoying becoming the Slayer. Eerie.

Do you plan on going into more detail on Cass's time in Athkatla?

Sorry for taking so long to comment, I've been trying to catch up on your story in between essay-writing and exam preparation. :) Now, I must apologise if this gets old, but once I again I have to say I love your realism. I've never thought about the practicalities of taking a bath while adventuring, and certainly not while in Spellhold and still afraid for your life. Nice, light chapter that balances out the darkness that went before and the darkness promised by the Underdark, I'm looking forwards to more! ^_^

Long overdue comment.

Good work! I’ve already told you anything constructive I have to say so all I can tell you now is that you suck for making me wait until Monday for the next part! :)

Hello, hello!

The migraine is indeed gone. It lasted about 24 hours until it finally went away (after much sleeping and some Daflagan Codeine). So, I am a happy person.

Really glad that you're still enjoying the series! I'm looking forward to finishing some new chapters and getting the story nearer to its conclusion. I don't know exactly how long that will be yet, but I'm guessing around 15 chapters. More and more 'original' touches (like the tattoo) come around in future chapters, so I hope you enjoy those, too :)

I'm really enjoying the story so far. Imoen is very in character: I always imagined she would take care of the PC whenever she could - as it is in your story - instead of just being helpless. I also like how you deal with inconvieniences of an adventurer's life. Most fanfiction writers tend to ignore facts like 'it is impossible to sleep in a platemail' and so on; you include and explain it, which makes the story real. It is great how you go into details of disarming traps or casting spells, too - for the same reason.
I never thought I would like anything about Mondays, but you managed to change my mind about this now - not - so - dreadful day ;) Thanks!

This is interesting. I'd thought Phaere's uh... proposed reward for Veldrin's hard work would have been the event to cause tension between Imoen and Veldrin. Your writing is excellent, and I'm looking forward to reading more!

Ooh, intrigue! I really enjoyed this chapter, and was also wondering if Phaere's 'reward' would cause tension between Imoen and Cassandra. Needless to say, I'm looking forward to her appearance in part two. For me though, I think the highlight of this chapter was how you've portrayed Cassandra/Veldrin's 'interaction' (? - that isn't the right word, but you get my meaning) with the Taint. I've read a lot of fan fiction in which the Bhaal essence manifests itself in the protagonist by merely turning them into an Emo, so it's refreshing to find a more realistic and unique perspective on things. As always, I'm eagerly awaiting the next chapter :)

I enjoyed this story from the beginning... from Cassie and Imoens darkest times to their most joyful moments!
In the epilogue, i like the involvement of the Seldarine to keep Cassie alive (or revive her). Another great idea in your novel!
Any chance there will be a ToB part of Crumbling Down in the future?
best wishes
Randir

As i said, i loved reading Crumbling Down, so i understand what you mean when you say the story is kinda finished at this point... but i'm sure you know the feeling when finishing a good book: really happy you read it, but at the same time really sad its over. So i hope you see the question about a ToB part as what it was... a desperate attempt to keep the journey alive ;) but on the other hand... Cassie and Im deserve their peace at De'Arnise Keep. And i'm eagerly waiting to play Imoen-ToB Mod anyway ;)

These news about a new, first original novel sound really exciting! I'm looking forward to it! Keep us posted